mandag den 15. august 2011

Back to the past

I cant remember the start of this nightmare I had last night, but I remember that I was back in the institution that  have lived in i 6 years of my life. The mansion ( believe it or not, the institution was a renovated small mansion.. ) had gotten bigger, there had cme larger rooms and the stairs were wider and better looking. I was inside my room, the room I had who turned towards th garden. For some reason I had been told that I should remove my stuff over to an other room, and I packed my stuff down and it all wen fine, I went out in the garden for a little while, but when  came back I didnt had any of my suff not in the old room nor in the new room, actually all my stuff were gone and the leader of the institution just laughed at me told me to get away as that little idiotic jerk that never will be good at anything else then using the municipality's money.
I began crying in frustration cause in my dream my parents were dead, and I had no where to go to. Even my bike wasnt there.

I looked up at him and he just began laughing even more, looking at me with disgust, just as Ama and Eli ( I call them this just to protect their true identity ) came. Ama laughed at me and so did Eli, untill she suddenly stopped. " Those are true tears... Make her stop." She looked over at th instutituion leader as e mae an ugly grimase, before bowing down and taking me up in his arms bridal-style. " Dont cry, I hate seeing young women cry.But your nothing worth and you know it, you should just end your life right now.. I can help you, but not here. I dont want to stain the inventory. " He took me down the stairs an right in the entranc door he stopped up, pulling out a sharp knife from somewhere aiming for my main artery.

t this point I woke up, crying..
I went to sleep again, only to get the exact same dream again... Waking up, crying and shaking as I in the drea had my whole bodylocked up whe first being in the leaders arms. ><

tirsdag den 9. august 2011

The mysterious girl

This will be a short log as its some days since I dreamt it ( forgive me aiz ^^; )
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I cant remember much, only that I was quite small, and ran trough some tall grass, the sun were raising up and in the far of, but yet not so far of, distace I could se some few mountaintops a forest and the sea. It looked long away but Im sure it wouldnt have taken more then 5-10 minutes to walk trough the forest over to the ocean.
I climbed up some grassfilled 'platforms' as I ended at something that reminded me of a garden.
There were a lot of bushes and a white birdbath that I someho flew up and used to cool myself down with, it was nice and funny. Suddenly I felt like someone were watching me, and as I looked up a girl in a white/grey shadowy-ish kimonolooking outfit. it was like the colors in the outfits constantly changed, and I jumped  down to her as she kneeled down in the grass, opening  her arms to me. I didnt think further cause it felt like she kinda needed the hug just as much as I did, so I ended in her arms, cuddling into the super soft fabric that her outfit were made off, while the sunrise, ocean, mountains and trees behind us made it a beautiful scenery.
I was small in her arms..
 I felt safe, even though I cried...

Then I woke up, all because I was crying whih made me a bit cnfusd untill I remembered the dream. though it annoyed me a little that I didnt get to see the girls face or hair, only her chin and her lips who had smiled friendly yet sadly.